R6P2D13/29 - Disengaging my force fields

January 25, 2012

Round 6 (R6), Phase 2 (P2) Very Low Calorie Day (VLCD) 13/29

It's been a rather ho-hum sort of Round thus far.  I'm not saying that in a dramatic, "I hate this" sort of way.  More in a, "I don't have much to say about it" sort of way.  My weight loss is tracking with other Rounds.  It's not the worst, but it's certainly not the best.  I am still making up ground from R5 Phase 4 (eating what I want in moderation).  I realized after writing the last time, that not only do I blame myself (going a little nuts with movie theater popcorn and Christmas goodies) for gaining in R5P4, but the steroids I took for the first time in my life (thanks to my head cold) ... but also for the "sugar free" Halls cough drops I ate like they were the elixir of life.  Something tells me that 100 sugar free cough drops aren't so "sugar free" when eaten constantly for a week.  Duh, Julia!

So, on to the weekend everyone.  This weekend, I will be trying something that I haven't done for a while.  I'm going on a coffee "thing" with a guy tomorrow.  I'm not calling it a date.  In fact (I hope you're sitting down), I don't want to date.  I haven't since I started HCG.  My head is elsewhere.  But, after being asked by a couple of random guys in the last two months (I skillfully deflected them ... FB can bring out some doozies, let me tell you), there's this guy.  No, my heart strings aren't a-strumming.  But, why not try something new?  I did with HCG, and I'm at a place in my life I never thought I'd be.  So, maybe this guy will be like HCG in my life.  Or, maybe he'll be like Weight Watchers was -- NOT for me.  But, how will I know, unless I put down the excuse force field ("I'm tired after work."  "We have nothing in common."  "I work long hours."  "I don't like meeting new people."  "I don't want to be distracted from my weight-loss journey."  "He won't fit in with my life.") and just have coffee, like he suggested several times, and move on.

So, I accepted.  I'm not losing sleep over it, but I must admit, I'm not sure if that was the right decision.  But, nothing is forever.  Certainly spending a couple of hours at Starbucks talking to some guy my friend recommended is not forever.  One thing I've learned about myself (among the many) from doing HCG is, if I don't open myself up for new experiences, then I better like what I've got.  Yes, I love my life as it is.  Would it be enriched by the man God has for me?  Absolutely.  So, unless I expect for God to plop a man into my life, as he would drop a star from the sky, I better be open to meeting guys.  I feel so dirty even writing that.  Don't worry (Mom and Dad) ... I'm not joining a singles website, or club (do they even have those anymore).  I'm just going for coffee and then meeting up with friends afterwards.

So, here goes ... force fields disengaging.

It

feels

weird

out

here.

:-)