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Monday, October 31, 2011

R1P2D15/31 - I'm almost 1/2 way (weigh?) there

October 31, 2011

Day 15/31

Boo! 

Guess who didn't drink enough water and messed around with her drops yesterday?  Guess who didn't lose weight (but didn't gain) when she weighed in this morning?  Boooooooo.  ; )

So, if you haven't noticed a trend by now from all of my past posts, the common denominator is, this is a learning process and attitude counts.  A good attitude will help me get through the tough or confusing times, and recognizing that I'm going slide to a halt from time to time is a good way to stop me from giving up and devouring 2 McRibs in one sitting. 

So, let's talk about yesterday (Sunday).  I had heard that you can take your HCG drops at any point in the day, just make sure to get in the 18 needed.  So, for the first time in my 2-week HCG journey, I took the drops AFTER I ate.  I also did not get in my 2L minimum of water.  I thought that might be an oops, because keeping the cells hydrated will flush the toxins and fat out (that my abnormal fat cells are releasing thanks to my 500 calories a day + HCG mix).  When I woke up and got on the scale, I FELT thinner (hallelujah) but didn't see any movement on the scale.  I wasn't frustrated.  Awesome!

That's when I decided, right then and there, that since I'm almost 1/2 way there (in days) to the end of P2, and I'm over 1/2 way done on what I should lose (no more than 40 pounds in a round of P2), I'm probably in a stall.  Not messing with my drop distribution (believe me, I am back to my 30 minutes before eating routine!) and drinking my water (I drank 1L in the 20 minute drive to work today!) I bet will show on the scale tomorrow.  BUT, if it doesn't, and the scale goes up or stays flat tomorrow and Wednesday, on Thursday, I'm doing an apple day.  An apple day is supposed to help get you out of a stall (4-day flat weight loss without doing anything differently).  You eat 6 apples (less is okay, but no more than 6) with a little bit of water all day, and the next day, the weight starts coming off again.  So, that's the plan.  We'll see if that little heart on my weight-loss ticker moves tomorrow.  If it does, I'm not counting this as a stall.  If it doesn't, and you see me in the grocery store with my cart loaded down with apples on Wednesday night, you'll know what happened.

Happy Halloween!

Sunday, October 30, 2011

R1P2D14/31 - Two weeks and 21.3 pounds down

October 30, 2011

Day 14/31

Cue the fanfare ... start the drum roll ... I have achieved 20+ pounds off AND two of my mini-milestones (seemingly) overnight.  I have gotten down to my starting WW weight of 2007 and lost 20 pounds by Halloween.  Awesome.

You know what?  This diet (I know, it's a protocol) seems to be easier and easier (from the motivation and resisting temptation realms) each day because the scale actually goes down.  I'm thrilled.

I'm going to end this blog with this thought: Joyfully resist temptation.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

R1P2D13/31 - Back off, Superstitions

October 29, 2011

Day 13/31

Normally, I would tell people that I'm not a superstitious person.  Normally.  But, I must tell you, today, as I was walking towards the scale, I actually felt afraid of what the scale would say for a couple of reasons.  1) I "only" lost 0.5 pounds yesterday (the last time that happened, I gained the next day!), 2) I wasn't feeling any thinner this morning (but, realistically, I'd have to lose 100 pounds over night for my brain to really register that I'm thinner) and 3) I am superstitious!  NO!!!!!  Yep.  I realized, in the back of my head, I was thinking that the weigh-in today would be bad because it's (you got it) Day 13.  Whatever, Julia.  I know better than that.  Believe me, you cannot be rolling your eyes any harder at me than I am.

Okay, that said, it's really not a person's quick impulses that define them.  It's what that person does with those impulses.  Give in or fight?  Push them from the mind or dwell?  What did I do?  I immediately prayed and thanked God for giving me the strength to stay pure and true to my word yesterday (I was at a birthday party with rice crispy treats, cheeseburgers on the grill, apple cider brats, baked beans, etc., being consumed all around me ... and they are major comfort food for me) and was happy about it.  I did what I was supposed to do, and I was true to my word to God that I'm going to stop letting food be an idol in my life.  I ate my yummy chicken, cut up tomato, melba toasts and a roasted apple (cored, remove a strip of skin from the middle and microwave on high for 5 minutes on an apple baker dish, then sprinkle plain cinnamon and stevia on it ... it tastes JUST like apple pie).  Who cares what the scale said today?  I did what I should. 

Maybe I should say that again ... WHO CARES WHAT THE SCALE SAID TODAY!  I have never, ever, in my life, said that or FELT that when I was on a diet, let alone one where I'm eating less than 500 calories a day (usually around 470 - 485).  What I love is that I knew, in my heart, that I did all I could (correct food choices, calories, water consumption, drops taken) that, come what may, my conscious is clear.  And, now I realize that this is something that had helped drag me down a bit (not that I'm a down person, but it did play a major factor in some nasty moodiness I could display from time to time).  I felt guilty.  Binge eating, hiding what fast food one really eats, etc., will do that to a person.  It's called sin.  And, I'm fighting this one meal at a time.  Sometimes, one moment at a time.

So, today, on this beautiful Saturday, I'm not giving into fear.  Last weekend, I stalled and then gained on Monday.  I had done a bunch of yardwork and thought I ate clean.  But, I didn't (as you will recall, I mixed veggies that is a no-no, and I didn't realize that).  But, this is a new day.  A new weekend!

Tonight, I'm going to a huge, 100 person+ cookout.  I'm bringing my apple to roast on a stick, a tomato (maybe I'll roast that too?), my water, melba toast and a bison burger.  That's right.  Bison.  It'll be my first red meat in almost 2 weeks.  It's approved on the plan, so we'll see what the scale says tomorrow.  If I don't hit the 20 pound off mark (which is 0.6 of a pound away), then I'll change the plan for Sunday.  I'll face Halloween when it comes (candy, chili and all) and tell myself that on December 12, when I enter into Phase 4 (eat normally), I can have chili if I want it.  Actually, I think I can have chili with sour cream and cheese (maybe just not the onions) -- my favorite way of eating it -- in Phase 3, which starts on November 21.  Good.  I can do that.

So, here's to almost hitting my previous WW starting weight, AND 20 pounds off, tomorrow or by Halloween.  That's my mini-milestone.  And, I'm sticking to it!

Friday, October 28, 2011

R1P2D12/31 - I finally don't mind Baggy Butt jeans

October 28, 2011

Day 12/31

Well, it happened.  I just had two people at work (who see me every day and don't know I'm on a diet) stop me as I was walking by and have this conversation with me.  "Julia, you are losing weight, girl!" said one.  "Oh, thanks," I said, astonished.  The other piped in, "You look great.  You need to get new jeans, because you're shrinking out of those!"  It's funny ... while I felt great about that, I also immediately thought, "It's just because it's jeans day."  Funny how I'm making excuses FOR losing weight.  Especially when, in most cases, jeans (the baggy variety that every fat person wears) make people with a big stomach, rear and/or hips (me, me, me) look bigger than smaller.  So, I look smaller.  AND, I'm wearing my fat jeans. 

What, do I expect that I'm going to be the only one who notices when I lose 25, 50, 75 or 100 pounds?  No.  So, something has to be showing to the outside world when I lose 16.9 pounds.  Or maybe I should say, something should STOP showing (16.9 pounds of me).

This morning, I made a list again of small milestones I want to hit.  For instance, by Halloween (Monday), I hope to be at 20 pounds off.  That's 3 weigh-ins from now.  It's a stretch, but it COULD happen.  Why have goals if they don't stretch me?  Then, I'd like to lose another 5 pounds by November 10, which is the weight I was last year, after having my tonsillectomy and I couldn't eat for 2 weeks.  I got down to that weight, and immediately put it back on (and then some) because of course, my body didn't take from my abnormal fat cells, but my normal ones (see Dr. Simeons' Pounds & Inches book).  This time, it's NOT coming back on.  I can see it too.  Because, I don't look drawn, or droopy, or anything.  I look the same, only the slightest bit smaller.  And, my jeans are really baggy.  I'm about to look like one of those teens you see in Walmart with baggy butt jeans, and I'm 40!

I'm so hip.  Actually, I'm a little less hip than I was 16.9 pounds ago, thank you very much.  : )

Thursday, October 27, 2011

R1P2D11/31 - Baby step goals

October 27, 2011

Day 11/31

I just got off of the scale.  I lost 2.1 pounds.  That makes my grand total 16.4 pounds (not "just" the 16 that little heart on the ticker is showing).  : )  I have moved into another decade too.  Awesome!

I realize that my weight loss is a bit higher than average (so I'm sure I will hit a plateau sooner rather than later).  But, it also is a testimony to how much JUNK I put into my body.  Junk, junk, junk.  I was in denial about it before.  Not anymore!

Immediately, after thanking God for giving me the strength to do this with joy (and it's really not been a problem, which in itself is a TOTAL miracle), my mind moves to the next mini-goal.  I decided for today's short blog, I'm going to make a list of what some of them are:
  1. Get to 20 pounds lost
  2. Start cooking HCG Phase 2 recipes this weekend (cookbook is coming in the mail)
  3. Get to 25 pounds lost (and a new decade) 
  4. Organize my closets (I'm getting a LOT more done, now that I'm not spending so much time eating!)
  5. Get to 30 pounds lost
  6. Measure myself again to see the difference from starting the protocol (mid-Oct) & 1 month on the protocol (mid-Nov)
  7. Get to 35 pounds lost (and a new decade)
  8. Start planning menus for Phase 3 (which starts on November 21 at the latest)
  9. Get to 40 pounds lost
  10. Re-plan my next three/four cycles on HCG (I had put too much time in P4 ... it's 3, 5, 7, 10, 18 weeks, not 6, 8, 10, 12, 20).
So, that's it.  Big list.  But, it all seems like a fun list to me.  I might, just might, hit 40 pounds off.  My magic number is 35 - 40 off, which is the most I've ever lost.  I think it was really 35, but in my mind I had rounded it up to 40 over the years.  If I can get to 35 off, I'll be a happy girl, but 40 off this round would be spectacular.  It'll make me less weight than I've been in 8 years.

Now, it's time to get ready for work.  I wonder if the clothes I pick will fit more normally today?  No more looking like a sausage in my clothes, I hope.  I suppose that depends on the clothes (some were tighter than others, even though they were the same size).  I do have a dress reserved for when I lose 20 pounds.  I'll hold off on that.  But, I'm going to find something today ... 16.4 off is something to celebrate!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

R1P2D10/31 - Seeing a difference makes a difference

October 26, 2011

Day 10/31

Woo hoo! 

Okay, I'm not going to lie.  I was THRILLED to see the scale go down this morning.  And, by 3.3 pounds to top it off.  But, that's not really what thrilled me.  It could have gone down by 0.5 pounds and I would have been happy.  3.3 pounds just elevates me to thrilled.  What makes me happy is, I stuck with it in 2 mildly alarming and 1 very discouraging day.  Losing 0.7 pounds at my Sunday morning weigh-in (after losing 2.0+ every day before) was a little ... well, "blink, blink, blink ... stick with it ... it's still within protocol."  Then, losing 0.3 pounds the next day, I started to seriously fight the enemy's voice saying to chuck it, because obviously the other weight-loss was a fluke.  THEN, yesterday, GAINING 1.1 pounds?  Heaven forbid.  That was a recipe for disaster for my in-it-to-win-it personality.  But, I stayed the course (thank you for that phrase, George W. Bush)!  I kept reading (it helped that the Pounds & Inches book came in the mail), asking others, and trying to think about what I did each of those days.

Well, I figured it out (at least for now, because stalls happen).  I was mixing my "approved" veggies.  Right there, in black and white, it says to eat ONE of each thing (the protein, fruit, veggie and grissini/melba).  I took the, "eat as much as you want of the veggie" to mean VEGGIES.  Oops, my bad. 

So, I stuck with it and lost.  Tomorrow, I could gain, because of some other silly little thing that I do today that I don't notice.  I hope not.  If the weekend taught me anything, it's that I can eat 500 calories or less and stay the same or gain, because there is a clear protocol of the foods to eat and the drops that really make the difference in Phase 2.  In Phase 3, the only no-no is sugar.  So, in most cases, I think I'll be able to go back to my eye shadow, hand cream and creamy soaps.  But, in P2, since everything is so reduced, I'm staying away from it all.  : )

Sidebar:  I just looked over (as I was drinking 1L of water in my "drink 3L of water a day" challenge to myself) and read, for what I bet is the first time, my calendar Bible verse. What does it say? "Whoever is thirsty, let him come; and whoever wishes, let him take the free gift of the water of life." Revelation 22:17b. I had to smile. Way to talk about the REAL water of life while I'm guzzling water down, God! : )  End of sidebar.  : )

Oh, and today, my only coworker who knows I'm doing this came back from vacation.  I hadn't seen her since Day 4 (October 20).  Right when she saw me, she said, "I can tell you've lost."  I said, "Oh, no you can't."  "Yes I can.  Right around here," she said.  She was pointing to the part between breast and belly button.  That's EXACTLY where I've been noticing it coming off.  "I can't see it in your face yet, but I bet I will soon," she continued.  So, for those of you reading this (??) who haven't seen me in a while, I hope you look at me very closely the next time I see you.  I want to know if you see anything and where (if you do).  If you don't, DON'T worry ... it won't frustrate me.  I'm seeing differences, but unless you're in the bathroom with me at 6 am (which, I assure you, none of you will be, so don't run screaming from the building), you won't see a difference for a while.

I want to lose 150 - 155 pounds (in my absolute ideal ... but I'll be totally fine with 130).  That means, I'm about 1/2 a pound away from being at 10%.  If I was in Weight Watchers, I'd get a sticker.  Maybe I'll give myself a sticker anyway.  Since, tomorrow, I could not only hit 10% off, but start a new decade in my weight, making that the 2nd decade I'm moving down into (out of the 16 I need to plow through).

It's the little things in life.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

R1P2D9/31 - I will survive!

October 25, 2011

Day 9/31

This will be a quick one for 3 reasons.  First, I don't think anyone actually reads these, so I'm doing this more to motivate myself.  Second, I'm running late this morning.  And, third, I gained 1.1 pounds overnight, while still eating less than 500 calories.  So, I'm doing something wrong.  So, today, I'm going to talk about keeping up a positive attitude in the middle of no or less than stellar results.

SO, I'm making a pact to myself (and, if anyone reads this, to you), to say that I'm going to reduce the added salt that I put on my food (even though it's legal, it's not great), since I almost never put salt on things before ... I guess I've been using it to spice up the food blahs that come ... and I'm going to really pay attention to what I put on my body (lotion, soap, hair stuff).  We'll see what tomorrow brings.  But, here I am, in the middle of a morning of, "Really, scale?!" to say, I'm not giving up, and I'm not going to let my mood be altered.  I'm going to let God's love shine through me (because that's what He wants) regardless of what the scale says, what my over-achieving brain says or what society thinks about the way I look.

Take that, scale.

Monday, October 24, 2011

R1P2D8/31 - Living Through Stalls/Gains (the dreaded word on any diet)

October 24, 2011

Day 8/31

Well, it had to happen.  The weight loss had to slow down.  Can you believe I'm actually happy about it?  2 pounds off a day wasn't healthy or sustainable.  So, as of yesterday (Sunday, Day 7), I lost 0.7 pounds, and today, it was 0.3.  So, I've lost 1.0 pounds in 2 days  (which, I must remind myself, is what this diet "promises" -- an average of 0.5 to 1.0 pounds off a day, only in this Phase 2, stage of the Very Low Calorie Days).  I'm at 12.1 pounds off in 1 week.  Uh, hello, Julia.  That's something to be happy about.  However, somewhere inside is that little voice saying, "But, I wanted this 2 pounds a day to last at least a few more days."  Well, back to reality ... would it feel any better if that weight-loss stopped in 2 days or 4 days or a week?  Nope.  I'd still feel discouraged.  BUT, actually, I'm not discouraged.  Shut up!

So, I thought about it.  Am I tempted to chuck in the towel?  Nope.  Am I tempted to overeat or starve myself?  Nope.  I'm sticking with the program.  Plain and simple.  I am learning many things in this protocol (journaling my food is easy and do-able, I don't have to eat fast food every day, I can and like drinking 3L of water a day, my body feels better when I don't eat junk, I sleep better when I don't eat junk, my mood is better when I know I'm doing the right thing regardless of what the scale says ...), but one of the things I've learned that startles me is, I'm the type of person who gives up if I can't win.  Huh?  I don't care if I lose a game, or if someone gets promoted at work.  I'm competitive?  Yep.  Against myself.  If I can't excel, I don't bother.  Yikes.  I think that attitude is what has contributed to where I am today.  If I can't be svelte thin in 3 months, why bother?  Well, honey, let me tell you ... it took a lot more than 3 months to get here, so I'm in it for the long haul.

So, what did I do?  I started planning (big surprise).  Yes, that's my drug of choice.  : )

I need to be realistic.  This is going to take a while to lose over 100 pounds.  Rome wasn't built in a day.  I didn't pack on this weight in a month.  So, get overself, Julia.  Have a plan.That's when I decided (for my own benefit, and yours, if there are actually people reading this), to write more details about each of the stages.  Now, here's the disclaimer.  I don't profess to be an expert on this.  I go to Abbie and Amy and Carrie with most of my questions, because, in my life, they are the HCG veterans.  Or, I go to the web, because there are lots of HCG websites and blogs to help.  But, you are reading my page, so I'll try to help both of us by outlining what I know:

2 DAYS
This is the phase where you load ("stuff yourself") on fatty foods like avacadoes, burgers, olive oil, breads, anything that is fatty.  Yes, it seems counter-intuitive to stuff yourself on a "diet" but it's about getting enough into your system that you can sustain the first week or so, that may be the hardest (since you're going WAY down to 500 calories a day).  If you've been doing Weight Watchers, or other restrictive diets, they recommend loading for 3 days.  Begin taking drops on these days (it takes 2 days to get them into your system).  Contrary to popular belief however, the hCG used in the HCG diet protocol is a variation of the HCG form used for fertility treatments, and in a much smaller dose.  All HCG used for medical purposes is natural, but created in laboratories from sterile cells.  It is NOT extracted from women or animal urine- a common misconception.  WEIGH YOURSELF EVERY DAY!   Do not exercise during this Phase.  Concentrate on stuffing yourself.  (This was a no brainer for me, since that was the theory of my life.)
PHASE 2 --> VERY LOW CALORIE DAYS (VLCD)

21 (minimum) to 40 (maximum) DAYS
This is the 500 calories a day stage.  You take your drops 3 times a day (20-30 minutes before consuming food and 20 - 30 minutes after consuming any water).  They are homeopathic HCG drops (google it) and cost about $30 a bottle (which should last through 2 cycles of all 4 stages).  You only take the drops in Phase 1 and 2.  You can drink as much coffee & tea (caff or no caff) or water.  No other drinks allowed.  You can use Stevia in anything (it's a natural sweetner that comes from a plant).  You eat off of the food list (I'll put that on a later blog, or ... you guessed it ... google it).  You can come in under 500 calories (try not to come in TOO low) but don't go over 500.  You decide how many days you want to do based on your schedule/weight-loss needs.  You must do it 21 days (otherwise, your body will gain back what it lost) but no more than 40 days, because your body will stop responding to the HCG.   This is very important -- on the last 2-3 days of your Phase 2, stop taking your drops.  You won't be hungry, it just takes at least 2 days to get them out of your system, and if you go into Phase 3 with them in your system, you will gain.  WEIGH YOURSELF EVERY DAY!   Do not exercise during this Phase.  Concentrate on healthy eating and drinking your 2-3L a day. 

21 DAYS
This is a very important step.  It's 3 weeks of staying within 2 pounds (not 2.1 or more) above or below your last weigh-in weight in Phase 2's VLCD.  The reason this is important is, this time is when your body is re-setting your hypothalamus gland.  Google it (see a pattern?).  But, basically, it's when your body begins to read that THIS weight is your new high.  This is supposed to help keep us from ballooning back (or over) our starting weight in Phase 4.  If you end up even 0.1 pounds above or below your last VLCD weight, you must do a correction day.  They can be an all steak, egg, greek yogurt or apple day.  I haven't investigated too much with that, since I'm concentrating the most on Phase 2 right now.  Google it.  ; )  This is the phase where you eat mostly protein (I call it an Adkins-like phase) and fats ... limit sugars and carbs (which are fancy words for foods that break down into sugar in the body).  I've read that some people slowly reintroduce foods back, others go full throttle into proteins.  I'm betting, after 35 days, I'll want to go full throttle.  I believe I'll be having 1 meal of all-bacon and cheese.  Kidding.  WEIGH YOURSELF EVERY DAY!   Begin exercise in this phase.

6 WEEKS (between 1st & 2nd time through), 8 WEEKS (between 2nd & 3rd), 12 WEEKS (between 3rd & 4th), 20 WEEKS (between 4th & 5th) or FOREVER (if you only have 20 - 30 pounds to lose and you do this 1 time only)
This is the normal eating phase.  Hooray!  You shouldn't gain weight here, but if you do, you can do a correction day (I've heard).  Right now, this is like the mirage phase ... is it possible to eat garlic bread on a diet?  Evidently, yes.  Within reason.  It's not possible (nor do I want to) go to fast food everyday.  EXERCISE every day, if possible.  WEIGH YOURSELF EVERY DAY!  

Okay, I didn't see this in any of the official protocol steps, but I think, at least for me, this will help me see what makes me gain, and what keeps me the same.  Everyone's body is different, so donuts and cheese may not make John Doe gain weight, but maybe the combo does for me? 
So, after all of that, how does explaining the phases and time frames help?  Well, it shows me that since I want to lose over 100 pounds, and the only Phase where you lose weight is Phase 2, I'm not going to reach my goal in 6 months, or even a year.  Realistically, it'll take me 16 months (including no loss days or slight gain days or correction days) to get where I want to be.  But, I'll be GETTING there.  That's the point.  I won't be this size in a year.  Or in a month!  Or in a week?  Maybe!  I'll emerge from this fat cocoon, a smarter, more confident person who has healthy eating habits.  How freeing! 

I'm not racing in a sprint, but in a marathon.  I've always wanted to run one of those.  Maybe now I can.  : )
PHASE 4 --> MAINTENANCE
PHASE 3 --> STABILIZATION
PHASE 1 --> LOADING

Saturday, October 22, 2011

R1P2D6/31 - Aaaaaaand the scale keeps going down!

October 22, 2011

Day 6/31

I just weighed in again.  I'm down 11.8 pounds since Monday.  Holy buckets! So, today, Day 6 of 35 of the VLCD, I'd like to talk about planning ahead.  I have morphed over the years into a lazy eater.  I cannot blame this on anything or anyone other than myself.  Left to my own devices (and I call them sinful devices, because I let food become my master), I wanted to eat what I wanted, whenever I wanted.  I constantly stuffed my face when I ate something, like I was a death row inmate and this was my last meal.  Well, that food philosophy brought me to where I was on October 17 ... 2.5 pounds away from my lifetime, all time, bloated, uncomfortable high (which I was in 2009).  When I got honest with myself, I could see that I'd been in this weight-gain/food tornado for at least 5 years, and have been obese for 15.  Something had to change ... and diet pills, weight-watchers, stomach-staples were not my thing.  What was?

Planning.

Okay, those of you who know me are thinking, "Um, that's you, Julia.  So, how did that help you get fat?"  It didn't.  It was LACK of planning that enabled me to go-with-the-flow with food.  Even when I'd try to lose weight on other methods, I'd put about 1/2 of my heart into it and do some weight-loss program, but not really journal my food for long.  That's the absolute recipe for disaster.  You can't 1/2 plan anything and expect it to be successful. 

So, for those of you reading this who need to lose weight and find yourselves like me -- with a pit in your stomach at the thought of having to (gulp!) journal your food -- let me tell you, if THIS lazy, short-attention-span monkey can do it, so can you.  It truly isn't hard.  Let me explain how you can be "lazy" and love/be successful at journaling your food:
  1. It works -- you'll lose weight.
  2. You won't be surprised by/dread your weigh-ins.
  3. It works!
  4. You will have what you need in your house for healthy food (by planning ahead)
  5. It works!
  6. It's easy.
  7. Did I mention?  It's easy and it works!
So, here's how it can be done.  I'm sure there are a lot of websites that can help you, but I found (thanks to my Abbie's Angels peeps) a website (and iPhone/Droid app) called myfitnesspal.com.  Yes, it's a website.  I've tried a couple of websites in the past.  But, unlike others, they don't send you spam, it's FREE, and it's easy.  Are you starting to see a pattern?  Easy seems to be tattooed into my DNA.

You can put in how many pounds you want to lose each week, how much exercise you want to do, each meal (every food item on the planet is in there ... the carbs, calores, protein, etc.), water, your weight, your measurements, you can blog (which is where I started this, then moved it here ... and I've never blogged before!), get reports on your progress, see a cute little tracker of how much weight you've lost (mine is pasted on this blog), get recipes, invite and follow other friends who are using this app (sort of like FB for fatties/former fatties), etc.  It's easy.  Easy.  EASY.  And, pretty cool.

No, I'm not getting paid by them.  I'm just excited I'm using an easy tool that tracks for me.  I don't have to write stuff down (I'm NOT a paper person).  I can log it in, reference it any time on my phone, and go.  Without it, I would have gone over my 500 calories a day, for sure.  My portion control has been SUPER messed up over the years.

So, as I log off and go head-first into Day 6, I'm not hungry & obsessing about food, not discouraged and not afraid.  Maybe I should use the positive version of those phrases:  I'm satisfied, encouraged and fearless to face today.

I can't wait to see the scale tomorrow!

Friday, October 21, 2011

R1P2D5/31 - I may be 40, but as of this morning, I'm down a decade

October 21, 2011

Day 5/31

Okay, if you haven't read my other blogs (I think it was the first one), I explained that a decade is 10 pounds in weight.  So, as of this morning (Friday, October 21), I'm down a decade from when I weighed-in on my starting day of this HCG protocol (on Monday, October 17).  10.1 pounds, to be exact.  Woo-hoo!

You know, the funny thing is, I "only" lost 1.9 pounds from yesterday's weigh-in (see my post from yesterday on the 2.6+ that I've lost the other three days) and you know what I thought?  I wonder if I did something wrong?  WRONG?  Am I nuts?  Okay, maybe a little.  The average weight that a person is supposed to lose on this is between 0.5 and 1.0 pounds a day.  So, no, I'm not doing anything wrong.  Did I do anything different (like put on lipgloss with vitamin E in it, use hand cream with lanolin, eat over my 500 calories)?  Nope.  And, I lost almost 2 pounds!  Good, then I'm golden.

I'll tell you one other little tidbit ... when I was getting ready to take a shower, I definitely look different in my midsection (between my bellybuttom and my chest).  It's not so inflated.  Awesome.  AND, this is going to sound weird, but, when I looked down at my feet, I can actually see the veins around my inner ankles.  Now, that may not mean anything to you skinny people reading this (you're probably thinking, "Um, Julia?  I can always see the veins popping out around my ankles.").  Well, I cannot remember the last time I saw them.  It's all of that bloating and fat and water retention from NOT drinking water.  I guess the 3L a day is actually good for FLUSHING my system, instead of making me retain more.  You know, for a college graduate, I can be pretty dumb some times.  : )

So, I'm facing my first weekend of VLCDays.  I am planning on doing well.  How, you may ask?  Planning is the key word.  At least for now.  I've got a "date" with some friends tonight (who don't know I'm doing this because they'll probably think it's whacky, like I did, until the see 30 pounds off of me) and I told them I'm bringing my own food because I'm trying to watch what I eat.  So, I packed my lunch and dinner this morning.  Not difficult.  Oh, yes, and in case you're wondering (from a previous post), I still have the same $2.33 in my wallet.  : )

Oh, another ring-a-ding-ding from yesterday ... I found out I can have no sugar applesauce (or make it myself by boiling a red delicious apple and mashing it).  That can be my apple serving.  Nice!

Tomorrow, I've decided, after I do a bunch of Autumn yardwork (which might make me hungrier, but I'll fight it), I'm going to google HCG recipes, so I can do something different with the food I have.  I don't want it to start tasting boring.  I went grocery shopping last night for the first time in this VLCDays and I faced many a temptation (and smell) and won!  Woo-hoo!  I bought fresh (frozen) white fish (many varieties) in amounts that, once I weigh them and split them into 100g portions, will probably feed me for the rest of my 31 days.  So, I'll prepare them & freeze them like I did with the chicken.  I think I need to buy a steamer.  Oh, and I looked on the food list and found I can have asparagus.  So, I bought at least 10 varieties of fish, 5 huge tomatoes, 4 huge cucumbers and 3 bunches of asparagus at Krogers (not cheap) for ... $41.  That'll feed me for at least a week (the veggies) and a month with the fish.  CRAZY.  I cannot believe how much I used to spend on food.  The money savings is almost as great as the weight-loss.  Almost.

So, before I sign off for the day let me share a fun (you might call it childish, but I call it fun) help that my friend Carrie told me she does.  When she sees a vending machine, she actually scowls at it.  It helps her feel a little control over any urges she might have.  I LOVE that.  So, I did it the 4 times I walked by one yesterday (which is right by the bathroom at work).  It made me smile afterwards and feel like I have power over what I put in my mouth.  Again, you skinny people are thinking, "You always did, Julia," but when you've been fat as long as I have (15 years), it's amazing how fast you feel powerless over food.

And, here's a shout out to my Abbie's Angels (since she was the one that started all of this by looking into it this Spring) ... keep up the great work, girls!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

R1P2D4/31 - I looked a Twix in the eye, and I won!

October 20, 2011

Day 4/31

That's right ... I had Twix candy bars all around me last night (with the 5 S children getting an early Halloween treat at home), and watched them eat it (some, right in my lap, so I could smell it).  Guess what?  I thought it smelled good, it would have been tasty, but I didn't want any.  Can I say that louder?  I didn't want any!  Not the, "Oh, I'll make do."  It was a, from the bottom of my being, the very tips of my toes, I didn't want any.  It isn't worth it.  Someday, I'll have one again.  If I feel like it.  Maybe I won't.

I am stunned that this is working for me!  Okay, I'm sure you're thinking, "How can you be stunned, when you chose to do this?"  Well, it's because in the back of my mind, I thought either I'd do something wrong, or that I'm vastly different from all other human beings.  Surely this weight-loss phenomenon can only work for a lucky few.  Well, let me tell you, it's working for me, and I'm nothing special!

I'm following the HCG program (Phase 2, Day 4), and satisfied with 500 calories of protein, veggies, fruit and healthy carbs.  I know, if you're reading this for the first time, you'll think I'm starving myself, and that the weight will come back on when I go back to eating more calories.  At least, that's what I thought when I watched two of my friends start this in April.  But, they've been through 2 rounds (meaning, the Phase 1 loading 2 days, Phase 2 very low calorie days of between 21 - 40 days, Phase 3 protein 21 days, and Phase 4 which is 6 weeks of eating normally) -- TWICE people -- and have lost 60 pounds (and kept it off) and 40 pounds (and kept it off).  My other friend is just starting her 2nd round, and she's lost 25.  So, it works.  The best part is, it works without having to try hard (killing yourself not to eat, exercise, white-knuckle it to make it through).  On the whole, I haven't been tempted.  But, when the temptation comes, I think, "I want to see that scale go down, why sabbotage my work so far?"  And, since Phase 2 is the only phase where you are losing weight, I want to lose as much as possible.

Did I mention that this costs about $30 for each round (that's all 4 phases)?  Yep.  $30 for the drops.  That'll probably get me through 2 rounds, but we'll see.  That's a $1 a pound.  WAY, WAY, WAY cheaper (and there are no bad medical side effects) than WW or any other pay-as-you-go program.  And, I'm not paid to endorse it.  I'm just excited.  Go figure.  I have never lost like this ... and felt so good.

Speaking of losing, I have lost 8.2 pounds since Monday.  Seriously.  And, I cannot say this enough ... I.am.not.starving.and.I.don't.feel.deprived.  Praise God!  So, each day, this is a breakdown of what I have lost since starting on Monday, October 17, 2011:

WEIGH IN:
Tuesday, October 18 --> 2.8 down
Wednesday, October 19 --> 2.6 down
Thursday, October 20 --> 2.8 down

I know this will slow down, and probably stall at some point (around day 10) and then jump start again, but for now, this 2.5+ weight loss each day is really motivating me. 

You know what else is motivating me?  I feel different.  Now, to the average person, I still look like a big, fat blob.  But, to me, when I'm bending, or standing up to move, or looking at my body in the bathroom mirror, I see a slight difference (for the less!).  Amazing.

So, as you watch me shrink (I'm not trying to sound egotistical ... I'm trying to stay positive that it WILL happen), feel free to talk to me about why this works and more details on the program.  That's what I did with my friends Abbie, Amy and Carrie.  It's working for them (you go, ladies!), and now, it's working for me!  This isn't a cooky fad ... it's proven from a 1950s medical study.  So, ask away.  Obviously, I don't mind sharing.  : )

R1P2D3/31 - There's already less of me & more in my bank account!

October 19, 2011

Day 3/31

I weighed in this morning, and I am down 5.4 pounds since Monday's highest weigh-in.  That's like 5 pounds of butter I'm not carrying around any more!  I'm quite happy about that.  And, I felt like I ate a lot of food yesterday (but at least 1/2 of it was veggies and the 2 fruits).  But, that's okay, they are good fillers, and they keep me regular.

 So, here I am, Day 3 of 35 of the VLCD.  I drank my 3L of water for the last 3 days, I hit my 500 calories yesterday (around 300 on Monday ... ooops!) and today, I'm all planned out for 500.  It's funny, I don't know why I rebelled at planning my menus ... it makes it a lot easier to skip Fast Food (the BANE of my existence ... I went at least 2x a day some days) and it saves MAJOR money.  I bet I was spending $10 - 20 a day on fast food.  I've been walking around with $2.23 in my wallet since Sunday evening.  And, I'm not touching it.  Boy, was fast food eating expensive on my body AND my pocketbook.  Not to mention that the food wasn't satisfying.  I'm really beginning to believe that while it might be comfort food, it's crappy, through-and-through.  

Don't get me wrong ... I love meatloaf and mashed potatoes and apple pie.  Homemade meatloaf and mashed potatoes and apple pie.  But, I don't need some cafeteria in a grocery store making it for me.  Who knows what partially-hydro-addiciting-chemical that goes in it.  Homemade is the way to live and be successful at weight-loss and weight-maintenance for me!  I can do this ... it doesn't take that much to plan meals, cook for the week, etc.  And, I'll tell you what, plain chicken breast (skinless, boneless) grilled on my George Foreman Grill with only the lightest garlic salt is AWESOME. 

Okay, before you roll your eyes so much that they stick, let me just say, I know this is the honeymoon stage.  I'm only in P2, Day 3 (D3).  But, I'm NOT crabby, I'm NOT longing for more food.  And when I feel that pang of, "It's breakfast time.  Go get the McDonald's Sausage Egg and Cheese McGriddle," it's actually freeing to me to remember, NO, I'm not eating that now.  And, I know the fact that my body already feels better is a direct result of that poison not going in my body.  Heck, the first day, I had "dinner" (I brought my own food) with one of my dearest friends and watched them eat comfort food (including apple pie) and I literally did not care!  It didn't feel like a sacrifice not to eat it.  And, should I remind you that Monday was the day I only ate 300 calories?!

I can see that this "diet" (I'm seeing now why they call it a protocol) protocol is a life change, not just a grit your teeth and bare it for a season change.  I like that I know I can go to proteins (and I think healthy, whole fats like butter and coconot oil) in Phase 3 (P3) on November 20.  I like that I can go to real foods (not stuffing, but real foods) in Phase 4 (P4) and that Phase 2 (P2) will only last 35 days for me (Lord-willing, I'll keep losing that long).   No wonder why Amy and Abbie and Carrie all said that it's the success of it, seeing a pound (or sometimes more) come off each day is all the motivation they need to keep going.  I am the same way, and it's only D3!

I have put a little chart together (including my 35 reasons for staying in the VLCD for 35 days list) of weight-loss.  If all goes well with my body, I could be 38 pounds lighter in 35 days.  WOW.
So, as I wrap up this incredibly long post, I march into the day, feeling very equipped to be successful.  Prayer, journaling my food (this website makes it SO easy, and there's an iPhone app too ... awesome!), and remembering why I am doing this.  It's for me to feel better, be a better witness and ... dare I say it ... look better.  I can't wait to see myself emerge from this fat cocoon.

PS.  I'm 0.1 pound away from getting out of the decade (which I mentioned yesterday) that is HUGE, and I've been in for 2 years!  Here's to believing that tomorrow when I write this, I'm going to be seeing things from a different decade!

Round 1, Phase 2, Day 2/31 - Mischief Managed: no more fat clothes in my future!

October 18, 2011

Day 2/31

This is my first blog, ever.  I can't believe I'm writing about weight, or what my official starting weight was.  Yowsah.  I never thought I'd see these numbers, but, Lord-willing, it won't be for long.  At least not now that I'm following HCG.  So, I won't see them long, praise God!

Today is my 2nd day in the HCG Protocol Phase 2 (the Very Low Calorie Day).  Henceforth, known as P2 VLCD.  Yesterday, Day 1, went really well.  Of course, I was lucky to hit 300 calories consumed, not near the 500 calories.  Thanks to my friend Amy, I found out that I can eat a lot of veggies to get me to the 500 calories.  Of course, at 15 calories a serving on most of them, I'm still going to be hard-pressed to do it.  I think I'm going to have to buy some skim milk (the smallest container on the planet, since I L.O.V.E. milk and will be tempted to drink some) and add my Tbs to a cup of tea at night and I'll have to buy the Melba toast (which I have been avoiding like the plague, because I'm afraid if I eat one I'll eat 20).  But, I'm in-it-to-win-it, so no I won't.

In P1 (the loading 2 days), I gained 3 pounds, and I'm down 2.8.  Which actually excites me, because I did the math wrong this morning, and thought it was only 1.8! So, even though I'm still in the loading weight, I'm hoping that tomorrow, it will come off.  I'm thinking I'm going to have onions (grilled on my George Foreman Grill) and cottage cheese and tomatoes for dinner tonight.  I need to figure out some safe seasonings to use.  But, that will come in time, I'm sure.

Oh, yesterday I drank about 3 liters of water (a first in my life).  So far today, I'm about 1 liter (33 ounces).  They recommend 2 - 3 liters of water a day.  The big "they."

Man, this is all over the place.  I guess it's time for me to eat my first meal (lunch), as it's 12:52 and I took my drops at noon.  That about counts for the 20 minute wait time.

My daily food today will be:

Lunch:
3.5 ounce (100 g) of boneless, skinless chicken breast (grilled) + 1 red tomato (plain)


Dinner:
3.5 ounce (100 g) of skim milk cottage cheese + 2 red tomatos + 1 onion (grilled) + 1 orange


Snack:
1 apple, 1 grissini breadstick


Maybe this will get me to my minimum (or near to it).

So, as I leave my first, and hopefully, most skitzo blog, I'm going to march onward into a new "decade" of weight (as I like to call each new "10" (you know, 150, 140, 130 ... I wish!).  Hopefully by tomorrow (Wednesday, October 19).  Definitely by Thursday.  Here's to you seeing less of me the next time you see me!